Wednesday 4th April 2012 - leaving Taman Negara to go to Penang

The drive out of Taman Negara at 8.30 in the morning was just beautiful. It was a bumpy mini bus ride and I was being flung everywhere but the sights made it ok.  I got to see men and women fruit picking in their brightly coloured pointed circular hats. There were water buffaloes strolling along the road, we drove past them so closely and I got to see their beautiful faces up close. There were herds of cows and their babies eating the grass - one of them didn't seem to mind that there was a bird just sitting on his back while he munched away. We went through fields of thousands of palm oil trees. I saw families building structures together, those that weren't helping with the building were congregated in beautiful brightly coloured head scarfs pottering around in the background. The togetherness of the Malaysian people was something I absolutely adored about their culture - from seeing the people building the house together, to remembering back to perhentian islands - The tide was getting really high one night and a group of the locals boys took it upon themselves to get together to pull each of the boats higher onto the beach. It was like it didn't matter who it belonged to, they just heaved at them one by one laughing and joking as they went along. It was such a beautiful thing to watch and I just felt such a sense of community that I have never experienced before. There was no long discussion beforehand or one person trying to round people up - it just happened!! They didn't want anything for it or look around for acknowledgment. They just all went back about their business.  During the long 10hour drive i got thinking about the jungle. Max had told me that all the different tribes of Malaysia usually live off different parts of the earth. So his tribe, the Bujun tribe, lived off and worked off of the water. There were others that lived off the jungle. It was in their blood. If I was ever to be apart of a tribe it would be the Bujun tribe as I loved the water. Although I am still scared of the unknown sea creatures I felt happy by the sea - I was at my peak. I was able to meet great people and able to shine. Whereas at the jungle, I felt way out of my comfort zone and went into myself. I didn't feel much like talking, I wanted to sleep a lot and I found it difficult to appreciate the people around me and the experience. It was only on the minibus out that I actually started believing what I had been trying to tell myself while I was in the jungle - it really was an amazing opportunity to explore the thousands of creatures of the jungle but all I focused on while I was there, was getting out.  In the jungle laughing at myself was even that bit more difficult because I was angry that I couldn't master the task at hand. I wasn't agile, I didn't have the coordination or balance to stay upright and my body was exhausted all the time. I think that was my biggest issue - not shining. No one else seemed to have these problems and I felt that everyone else must have thought I was a big baby and moaned all the time - which upset me more. This is and always has been one of my weaknesses - caring what people think all the time but instead of pushing through the cloud of doubt, I go inward.  Whilst in the jungle I had also started reflecting on inhibitions and fears. I thought back to when I was maybe 9 or 10 and used to go camping with my dad. Back then I had no care and made no acknowledgement for danger or death and would jump in lakes with no care for what lived in the lake. Now as an adult I am all too aware of things that might live in lakes and put up so many barriers because of these awareness or fears of the unknown. It is something that happens to all of us. When i was little again, whilst at a swimming pool with my parents, I couldn't swim yet and was still wearing armbands but I bravely took my armbands off and jumped straight into the deep end. Of course I had to be saved but it was just the braveness of being a child that I miss. The child I mentioned yesterday that wanted to take on the big yellow and black bee. Although I understand and accept that this adult awareness and acknowledgement for potential dangers can sometimes stop us from getting killed, some of the things that we stop ourselves from doing have such little risk involved but we turn the fear into a barrier. I am glad I eventually got into the river yesterday despite being extremely apprehensive. I am glad I did the jungle trek and stayed in huts and caves and got bitten by leeches. Where is the fun in sticking to the norms and where is the growth and challenge in doing the things you are comfortable with. My journey has always said to be one for growth and although I would say I have been pretty open so far, I am going to be consciously aware from now on that I need to let go of the inhibitions and just enjoy the ride. The jungle would have been more fun for me if I did this. It's a hard thing to do, I know, and it really does require a lot of focused thinking, but I think it is something that holds a lot of us back. Live for the moment and try to find the enjoyment in things rather than taking life and yourself so seriously all the time. And although many of you will want to put my head on a stick for saying this, I am not afraid of death from doing something crazy! Of course there are risk assessments needed for certain things and certain things you just don't do - like jumping from a plane without a parachute, but if fear of losing my life means living a quiet and risk free life, I'm not down!  Upon arrival at Penang I had to try and find a way to get to Ferrenghi Beach. On the bus journey Anaz, the main singer in the band from The monkey bar in Perhentian, had texted me advising me to stay at Lazy boy Guesthouse in Ferrenghi. I didn't know any better so was going with the advise. A taxi was going to cost me rm35 which was too much so I asked the people at the taxi stand which bus I should get. I walked to the bus stop armed with my heavy backpack and got speaking to a couple from England whilst waiting for the bus. There were in maybe their 50s or 60s and had come to Penang for a holiday. They had only met 7years ago but I loved that they were older and were brave enough to venture away from Europe. The lady was from Birmingham and the man from from Banbury - the lady had moved to Banbury to be with him. They said they made it a point to try new food everyday - lastnight was frogs legs and tonight they were going to the night market in Ferrenghi to get some nice food. The bus journey took maybe 30minutes. I got to Lazy Boy but an English guy that was staying there explained that despite them having rooms, the boss was angry and didn't want anyone staying there right now. He pointed me in the direction of a place literally one minute away, so I checked in there. I dropped my things down and proceeded to the night market to try and get some food. I walked around a bit as my stomach was still feeling really dodgy and then got some noodles with pork, chicken and prawns in gravy. Malaysia is a predominantly Muslim country but Penang has a lot of chinese and Indian people so this was the first time i had seen pork since the start of my trip.  Apparently the large amount of Chinese and Indian people in Penang is because the British brought them over here in the 17th Century and they have stayed in Penang since.  After food my stomach was hurting so I just went to my room and slept.